Shit day, can't put it more eloquently than that. Con has been gradually becoming more and more swollen around his chest, stomach, thighs and groin due to a kind of fluid retention caused by the surgery,we've been told to get him out of bed to help move the fluid, with no success and it's causing him more pain. We helping him sit up and walk him up and down the corridor but he just moans constantly and just wants to go and lie down, we've had the doctors in nearly 6 times today as we're not happy he is still uncomfortable he can't even eat now as the swelling around his chest is rounded front and back - he looks so out of proportion with his tiny limbs. Time. Apparently more time is needed for the fluid to disperse on its own, which is just not what we want to hear. After all our little boy has been through this week alone another day in discomfort seems just too unfair. So we have another sleepless night, another day of waiting and then if he is still the same, he will have something called a 'shunt', which sounds awful and basically means another tube has to be inserted under his skin with a kind of pump in his chest that u push up to 6 times a day to move the fluid around. Can't even explain how crap and useless me an rik feel, I haven't been home since last thursday, I miss my girls so much I'm close to tears 24 7 without adding on the heartache i feel for Connor. Oh an just to add to the shitheap, our Oncology team are pushing for his stem cell harvest to go ahead next week as his high dose Chemo starts as early as the 14th of this month, which if we're lucky means Con will get maybe 3/4 days at home now before he is back here for at least 6 weeks. I know it's his treatment programme, I know it's like this because he needs it, it's as hard and as aggressive as the bastard cancer it's fighting, but it doesn't make it any easier to swallow or any easier to watch. So can some 1 pls tell me what our amazing little boy did to deserve this ? what my girls did to deserve this? what me and rik did to deserve this? What any other child fighting this or who lost their fight did to deserve this? I fucking hate NB, its an evil evil thing.